» Return Statement
Life: phones, voicemail
Robots and elderly relatives have finally driven me to extreme measures.
My voicemail greeting is now this “you have reached a number that has been disconnected” recording repeated for sixty seconds as a multi-pronged attack on voicemail:
- The notes are the “intercept” special information tones indicating a line is disconnected and the robots should mark the number as dead.
- The words should confuse or bore humans enough to hang up.
- The length should prevent me from getting two-second empty voicemails from people hanging up too slowly.
(Before you suggest, my phone company doesn’t let me disable voicemail.)
A potential failure is that I want to continue doing business with a few companies that robocall me with notices (insurance, finance, utilities).
If one of their robots flags my phone number as bad it might become a customer support hassle where they think they no longer have a valid phone number for me.
I’ll edit in an update if this becomes a problem.